yeam i’ve been drinking. i want to cut to bleed. i threw up so i’m rid of fat and ugly.

maby i will cut when i’m home. 

ji

Age: 19

Label yourself (prep,goth,druggie,weirdo, etc.): Drug addict, outcast

How long have you been cutting?:  For 7 long years.

Favorite tool?:  My hair-cutting shears or razors.

Where (place) do you cut? (school,home, etc.):  If it’s urgent, I’ll head towards the nearest bathroom…but I usually do it in my room or in the shower.

Do you have to hide your whole arm(s) (wrists,forearms,& upper arms etc): Yes. People tend to stare at my dark purple, lumpy lines.

Do you have to wear long-sleeves & long-pants all the time?: Always.

Do you cut on your stomach, or chest?: Both.

Do you cut on your hands, neck, or face?: I’ve cut on my hands on several occasions. I also cut my face and my neck once before.

Are your legs, arms, & other body parts covered in scars?: My left arm and both legs are covered in scars.

What’s your favorite excuse to use when someone asks about a cut/scar?: I ask them “Are you really asking me this? Don’t make me say it.” 

Off the top of your head, about how many scars do you have?: I honestly don’t have a number. 

Have you ever been hospitalized because of your cutting?: Yes, on 4 separate occasions…not counting the 2 E.R. visits.

Do you have (diagnosed or not) Depression, and/or Bipolar/BPD?: I’ve been diagnosed with manic depression when I was younger…now it’s turned into Bipolar Type II and a case of severe anxiety.

Who knows you cut?: Family, friends and probably even strangers…

Have you ever been caught cutting?: Never.

Have your parents ever confronted you about a bloody sleeve, or towel?: Yes.

Did you have a good childhood?: I was luckier than most. I had a father and a home. 

Why do you cut?: I cut because I’m happy, sad, angry, depressed, anxious or any other emotion. It’s just so natural to me.

Have you ever talked to a therapist or counselor? I’ve always had a therapist.

Do you want to stop cutting, but can’t because of addiction?: I’ve been clean and sober for 6 months…it’s a struggle though.

Do you like cutting?: It’s definitely one of the loves of my life.

How many times have you tried to complete suicide? Too many times. Around 10 times, maybe?? That I can remember.

Have you ever done a school assignment on cutting, or self-injury?: Yes.

What do you like to listen too while cutting?: I have a playlist JUST for the occasion….

Have you ever needed stitches from cutting?: I’ve had a total of 9 stitches.

Do you dream about cutting? Used to.

Would you rather have a boyfriend/girlfriend that is also a cutter?: I wouldn’t mind if I did…it would be rather difficult to handle though.

What do you use to bandage your cuts after a session?: I used to have this long, black sock I would tie tightly around my arm so the bleeding would stop and I’d go to bed after that…

(Source: dirty-bones, via ittybittylittletiny)

…My mom got it in the mail today. We’re suppose to start it tomorrow…this shit better work.